Taylor:
[0:02] Julie’s really drunk.

Jewels:
[0:10] That’s not the funniest part. No way.

Taylor:
[0:12] How your sex toys can also work as fire escapes, preventing intruders from coming in.

Maggie:
[0:15] You want to learn about alien ovipositing and…

Taylor:
[0:21] Oh yeah. Do you want to hear about how you can be impregnated by an alien egg? There you go, listen to Vaginance.

Becca:
[0:28] Also just listen to us touch Julie’s sex toy that she brought and say, ‘ooh how soft!’

Jewels:
[0:28] And test the homemade lube. We’ve got it all tonight.

Taylor:
[0:30] Yeah. Yes.

Becca:
[0:37] Yeah, we’ve got it all.

Taylor:
[0:38] This week we test homemade lube and touch Julie’s vibrator. Doesn’t get more personal than that folks. See you next week!

Jewels:
[0:45] That does sound very strange when you put it that way.

Becca:
[0:52] Welcome to Vaginance. We have got a two part episode in front of us. In this first part, we’re going to be discussing sex toys, our favorites and our least favorites. What we like to use alone, what we like to use with partners etc, etc. And we’ll also be discussing how we approach the topic of sex with our partners or how we’ve historically done that and how we might get over any stigma we feel or anxiety, anything like that. In part two we’re gonna be talking a little more broadly about relationships and any transition our personal relationships might be going through and how we are dealing with that with communication and just anything else that comes along and, yeah, just how we talk to our partner. Here tonight are your vaginancial advisors. I’m Becca.

Jewels:
[1:48] I’m Jewels.

Maggie:
[1:49] I’m Maggie.

Taylor:
[1:50] And I’m Taylor.

Becca:
[1:52] Are there marshmallows in that Tupperware?

Jewels:
[1:57] Lube.

Becca:
[1:52] Lube?

Taylor:
[1:59] Oh, are we getting a taste testing?

Becca:
[2:02] Yeah. What?

Taylor:
[2:04] Yeah?

Jewels:
[2:07] Do not eat… I mean, it is edible, but this one does not have the essential oils in it that we would normally put in it, so it’s not going to taste like much.

Becca:
[2:14] What are we talking about? Seriously though, the lube world? I’ve technically been in the lube world for a while in the way that you learn as you age that you need more lube or whatever and that makes life wonderful. But only very recently have I been like, wait, maybe this world can be fun and not strictly practical. So I really want to talk about lube. I hadn’t even thought about that.

Maggie:
[2:41] Oh you’re talking about like with glitter and flavors and…

Becca:
[2:41] Flavors! Okay, so I didn’t know or I had never heard… I was texting Taylor about this. I had never heard of using like, flavored edible lube during oral sex. Like, it had never occurred to me. I’m like, well there’s already… there’s already lubrication. But oh my god, obviously there’s a ton of friction if you’re going at it for a while, so obviously lube would help with that, and like why not make something taste like a piña colada instead of…

Taylor:
[3:10] Penis piña colada.

Maggie:
[3:13] Peñis colada.

Becca:
[3:14] Penisy piña colada, pussy colada.

Taylor:
[3:20] Peñis colada, pussy colada. It works either way… pussy colada does sounds better.

Becca:
[3:22] Yeah, so… but yeah, no, I like had never considered it.

Taylor:
[3:29] Julie’s face.

Jewels:
[3:33] Piña cunnilingus.

Becca:
[3:33] Oh, that’s good.

Taylor:
[3:37] Oh, that’s… yeah, there’s, this is endless. Can we just spend the next hour just coming up with puns?

Becca:
[3:39] Just on piña colada lube?

Taylor:
[3:47] I also did not know that until you texted me about it.

Maggie:
[3:49] Well, they make flavored condoms which are for that purpose I believe.

Taylor:
[3:52] Mhm. Yeah.

Jewels:
[3:54] Yeah, because your vagina probably can’t taste it. If you can, listeners let us know.

Taylor:
[3:57] Yeah. Yeah.

Maggie:
[3:58] Call us immediately.

Becca:
[3:59] She loves it.

Taylor:
[4:02] That would be amazing.

Becca:
[3:59] I remember… it wasn’t until I was in my late twenties that I like, read a sexual health article and it was like, ‘Obviously use a condom when you’re doing oral sex’. And I was like, I’ve literally never heard of a single person using a condom… but like, obviously because you can get STIs. Basically as many STIs from oral sex as you can from penetrative sex. And we all just ignore that. Like, literally everyone.

Taylor:
[4:32] Yeah, I would love to get a survey of people who have used condoms during oral sex.

Becca:
[4:35] Yeah. And like, how did they get so smart? And, was it an argument when you got into that? Or dental dam, or anything?

Jewels:
[4:48] How did you manage the sexual communication?

Becca:
[4:51] How did you talk about it? Exactly. Which is something we’re going to get into. We’re talking sex toys, we’re talking sexual communication. And we might get into some relationship transitions that those of us in this room are experiencing today, so…

Maggie:
[5:06] I was just gonna say, I do think it’s an interesting… yeah, I don’t know how to say it eloquently, but like, basically as you get older and more comfortable in sexual health, you become better at being safe. Whereas theoretically it should be the other way around. Like, you should be really safe when you’re young and you don’t know what you’re doing.

Jewels:
[5:25] And you’re probably being more promiscuous… younger, exploratory.

Maggie:
[5:28] But like, as you get older and more comfortable asking for what you want and what’s safe and important for you, it’s easier to become safe. Whereas when you’re young you’re like, oh, there’s a stigma, like, they’re gonna be mad at me or that no one else does this. And so you just like, fuck it, whatever. It’s like… that’s sad and scary. I don’t know what the solution is to that other than education.

Taylor:
[5:50] Education is always the answer to everything.

Becca:
[5:52] And deshaming. Which comes from education.

Taylor:
[5:55] Yeah.

Becca:
[5:55] Just like it’s not shameful to use… it’s not shameful to have sex. It’s not shameful certainly to use protection when you do. So tell us about this lube.

Maggie:
[6:05] Just jumping right into the lube. All right.

Taylor:
[6:06] Yeah, Julie just brought lube to the meeting today. No, hold on. She bought a little thing of lube in a to-go plastic container and half a bottle of whiskey. So I’m not sure what kind of night we’re going to have here.

Jewels:
[6:20] This is Madeira. The whiskey’s next.

Taylor:
[6:25] Ooh, wow. Okay. So a lot of alcohol and lube, more than I was expecting on this.

Becca:
[6:25] I definitely just want to have….

Jewels:
[6:26] It’s describing sex for me. No I’m kidding.

Taylor:
[6:32] Julie made this a show and tell day.

Maggie:
[6:34] Honestly, it sounds like a really great setup.

Jewels:
[6:37] You didn’t even ask what’s in here.

Taylor:
[6:43] Oh shit. I didn’t know there was another container.

Maggie:
[6:44] It definitely has a charging port.

Taylor:
[6:43] Is it going to go off?

Jewels:
[6:45] It does. Well it has a travel mode so you can turn it off so that it will stay off until you plug it back in. So you don’t have to worry about it going off when you’re talking to the customs and immigration official.

Taylor:
[6:59] That is genius. But what is it?

Jewels:
[7:00] We’ll get there.

Becca:
[7:00] Oh my God. That is so great.

Becca:
[7:05] Yeah. Okay. Let’s have a lube segment. Let’s just start off with lube.

Maggie:
[7:06] Well, also I didn’t know this was show and tell.

Taylor:
[7:06] Yeah I didn’t know either.

Becca:
[7:13] Only one person did.

Jewels:
[7:11] Okay. So what really happened was when I…

Jewels:
[8:02] Okay, so lube’s great. All types of lubes are great. Different lubes definitely have different purposes. There are some that are safe for your sex toys but if you’re worried about the silicone breaking down – I’m not because even using this is primarily oil based lube, and I use it with my sex toys and have not had any issues whatsoever. If I’m using my sex toy that much with lube that it breaks down, I can buy another sex toy.

Becca:
[8:23] Yeah. And congrats.

Jewels:
[8:28] Yeah. Yeah. Thank you.

Taylor:
[8:30] Yeah, congratulations, you, get you get a badge for that – run down sex toy badge.

Jewels:
[8:31] Mhmm but that’s a totally different story. If you need like condom safe lube, of course use condoms, safe lube and oil ones I believe are not, they can cause it to potentially break. So I’ll always check that of course, most condoms come pre-lubed, but if you need more, I think it’s usually water-based lube is your go-to for that. I don’t love water-based lube because as it starts to dry it can get sticky, which kind of defeats the point of lube. So silicone’s much better. But I am such a big fan of this, which is actually mostly coconut oil and cacao butter. So coconut oil on its own is fine. But the cacao butter makes it a little bit creamier and longer lasting.

Becca:
[9:18] You always have so much cacao butter in your pantry.

Taylor:
[9:21] Now we know why. I never would have guessed it’s for your homemade lube.

Jewels:
[9:26] So it’s for lube and it is also for ice cream.

Taylor:
[9:29] That should be the like, name of your memoir, ‘Lube and Ice Cream’. Yes. We’re selling that on the fucking website.

Becca:
[9:32] Uh, make us sweatshirts that say ‘Lube and Ice Cream’, please. I’m going to write that down. I’m buying one right now.

Taylor:
[9:33] I want a crop top that says ‘Lube and Ice Cream’.

Becca:
[9:46] Oh, please!

Jewels:
[9:50] Um yeah, so coconut oil and cacao butter melted down and then a couple drops of like a cinnamon essential oil is really nice and a little vanilla.

Becca:
[9:51] Does that not hurt?

Jewels:
[9:59] It can be slightly stimulating but it’s not… it’s really about the amount and with cinnamon essential oil, you do not need much to get the scent in.

Taylor:
[10:00] So you do like any, like.. eucalyptus, mint?

Jewels:
[10:09] You definitely want to check and like maybe check on yourself with the essential oils to see if you have any reaction.

Taylor:
[10:15] Okay.

Jewels:
[10:15] So you can go with like – this has no essential oils in it. But I really love the cinnamon and vanilla.

Maggie:
[10:20] For the listeners who can’t see right now, when Julie said test on yourself, she was pointing to like the soft side of your wrist. That’s a good place to test something out before you test it out on your genitals.

Taylor:
[10:32] That is true. Thank you Maggie Scientist.

Jewels:
[10:35] Yes. At your own risk y’all.

Taylor:
[10:37] Yeah. Yeah, it was a good thing to mention.

Jewels:
[10:46] But yeah, so we’ll usually just melt it down and then we can throw it in one container and then you just have to warm it up a little bit before you use it. Or – we got little molds that are like silicone molds that are little coffee bean shapes, so we just pour it in there and then we just pop them out and we keep it in the fridge.

Becca:
[10:54] So that’s what those little things are.

Jewels:
[10:55] Yeah, they’re like little coffee beans. Also, they’re a little melty right now because they were not in the fridge, but you are welcome to…

Becca:
[11:02] And you would just take one and like warm it in your hands.

Jewels:
[11:06] Yeah. You can touch it. These are totally unused.

Maggie:
[11:11] Is it recycled?

Becca:
[11:11] That is so cool.

Taylor:
[11:12] Oh yeah we recycle the lube. I sit in a really hot sauna and sweat it out and then I…

Jewels:
[11:17] They’re really nice for partner massage and stuff as well.

Becca:
[11:21] Ooh, rub my hand.

Taylor:
[11:26] You want me to rub your hand?

Becca:
[11:28] I want to see what it feels like. It feels great.

Taylor:
[11:37] Yeah it is really nice. Smells like um chocolate? Yeah.

Becca:
[11:37] Desserts.

Jewels:
[11:40] So it’s very nice. Also with it being the small coffee bean size and fresh out of the fridge can be fun because you’re like, oooh, oooh that’s fresh.

Becca:
[11:45] Very nice.

Maggie:
[11:55] So many sensations!

Jewels:
[12:00] Yeah and your ability to target where you need it, so if you want it closer to your clitoris because you’re gonna have a lot of stuff going on there, if you want to pop one up inside and let that melt before play, it’s great.

Becca:
[12:02] Oh oh! Cool.

Jewels:
[12:10] Yeah. Much more convenient than like squirting a bottle of lube.

Taylor:
[12:14] Right. And a lot of people like, I feel like are very intimidated by the idea of, I mean, I don’t know what a lot of people think, but it could be intimidating, the idea of like trying to find the right lube and spending a bunch of money on lubes and you just don’t know if they’re going to like work with your skin. It might be a good idea to experiment with some safe home remedies. That’s cool.

Becca:
[12:28] Mhm. Yeah. That is so inspiring. I want to, I can’t wait to make my own.

Taylor:
[12:34] So do you put it in your mouth ever?

Jewels:
[12:40] Yeah you totally can. It’s all, this is all food grade – food grade cocoa butter and coconut oil. So many possibilities.

Becca:
[12:41] Cool. So what…

Taylor:
[12:46] That’s really cool. I literally never even thought of that until you brought… thank you for bringing that for show and tell today.

Becca:
[12:53] Yeah. So what led you to the path of making your own lube?

Jewels:
[12:53] So there is a company in Canada that makes love butters which are similar and have a lot more other things and the woman who runs it is actually an amazing herbalist who does extractions and makes essential oils for things and she makes one that’s sort of similar to this. But it is seriously like I don’t know, $80 for a container and it’s amazing and it’s worth it and it’ll last you. But I’d rather not when I just whip it up in my kitchen.

Maggie:
[13:26] Whipping the financial aspect back in here, I like it.

Becca:
[13:29] Yeah, little finance hack.

Maggie:
[13:31] Little hot tip.

Jewels:
[13:30] Can’t be not having that lube.

Taylor:
[13:34] Make your own lube ,make your own ice cream, ‘Lube and Ice Cream’, saving money.

Becca:
[13:34] Lube and ice cream.. That fucking sweatshirt, I can’t wait.

Maggie:
[13:39] Mhm. We should make a spreadsheet of how much you can save per year, making your own lube and your own ice cream.

Becca:
[13:43] Yeah, it would be a shocking amount.

Taylor:
[13:44] I want to see charts.

Becca:
[13:50] Yeah. The lube does last forever, which is nice. Yeah. So my lube journey, I have always just like picked random lubes that say they won’t break down condoms when that was most relevant in my life. And I found out, the one I like is the SKYN one, S. K. Y. N. They make a lube that I find effective and not sticky. Um, but yeah, now I was introduced, I was listening to the Sex with Emily podcast. If anyone’s ever listened to it, big fan, she’s the one with the sexual communication thing on Masterclass.

Taylor:
[14:23] I’ve been meaning to listen to that.

Becca:
[14:24] Yeah. Um, and she talks about how great lube is on all things, but especially oral sex, it’s really great and underutilized. And so I bought a flavored lube for the first time piña colada as you may remember. Um and yeah, it’s really cool. I think I really like it. It is a little… like the one I have is aloe vera based, which seems really cool but it dries pretty quickly so they’re like use a lot and you’re like okay that seems like a good idea, but then it’s really not because then there’s like a lot of lube in your face and that’s not as appealing.

Jewels:
[15:03] Uh huh.

Becca:
[15:04] Um yeah, so that’s a journey. But now with the idea of making my own, that seems really cool.

Maggie:
[15:11] I really like the ones… and there’s several different brands that do it, but the ones that like warm up with friction. Those are fun. If you haven’t, if you haven’t done that, they’re very fun.

Becca:
[15:11] I’ve never used those.

Maggie:
[15:24] I think… I mean, yeah there’s like lots of different brands. Even KY has one, you can buy it at H E. B.

Becca:
[15:27] Yeah

Jewels:
[15:30] KY has like a fire and ice or something like that, like the two are different stimulating.

Taylor:
[15:32] Yeah, I’ve tried that one. Yeah. I um, let me talk about my experience with cannabis lube.

Becca:
[15:38] Oooh yes please.

Taylor:
[15:39] When I was living in LA I went to a weed store and bought some weed and the guy gave me a free sample of cannabis lube and I put it on and like I didn’t feel anything for a while and then I woke up at like 2AM and it was like ‘Whoa, my pussy is high.’ Like it was crazy. It was amazing though. I would I would strongly recommend cannabis lube if you can get your hands on it.

Jewels:
[16:12] So would it be great for sex? Okay.

Taylor:
[16:14] Yes. Yeah, it was like insane but I felt nothing… but it took like hours.

Becca:
[16:15] Whoa.

Jewels:
[16:16] So this is maybe something that maybe you need to put on?

Taylor:
[16:22] Yes. Yes. It could be different. Yeah.

Maggie:
[16:23] It might be different per person because some people get high immediately when they smoke weed and then some people don’t feel it at all, so.

Taylor:
[16:29] But see, and this was like I had never had cannabis lube before. Um, but I had smoked weed many times and normally it’s like I get high pretty fast but I just put on like you know they just give you a little tiny thing of it and I just put all of that on and it was like, right before we were going to have sex and then I didn’t like, I was like, yeah, it’s just like lube whatever. And then it was like literally 3-4 hours later when I woke up and realized I was very….but it was like, I wasn’t head stoned. My vagina was stoned. It was noticeably stoned,

Jewels:
[17:02] What does that mean?

Taylor:
[17:09] Like numb and tingly and like it had its own mind. I can’t even, it was insane.

Becca:
[17:13] Wait, so did his penis feel it since I assume that was involved?

Taylor:
[17:17] I don’t… yes, it was involved. I don’t know because it was kind of like, it was on me for a really long time and not him for a really long time. So I don’t think it like really affected him as much. But that would be an interesting thing to experiment with. Like, what, what would happen if you put it on a penis? I don’t know.

Maggie:
[17:37] There’s a show on Vice called Slutever and they have a whole episode about cannabis and sex.

Taylor:
[17:41] Really?

Maggie:
[17:44] Mhm. It’s really good show.

Taylor:
[17:58] You’re always recommending Vice documentaries to me, I recall some other ones that I wrote down that you…

Maggie:
[17:59] I used to watch a lot more Vice when I had the channel on my TV, but I don’t need more so… but there’s definitely a sex toy episode that um shocked me at times and…

Jewels:
[18:11] And sent you online shopping at times?

Maggie:
[18:13] Yeah, there’s definitely like, ‘oh, like that could be cool’ and then other times where I was like, ‘wow, that’s very scary that people are into that’ but you know, people are into that. I’m not judging, I’m just, that would scare the shit out of me.

Becca:
[18:23] Yeah, there’s some interests out there that I didn’t know existed and then when I find out, I’m like wow, seems objectively dangerous.

Maggie:
[18:31] Well, the one… we may or may not edit this out of the podcast late, but the one that really like… I was just like, wow, I did not know that existed! Was they make these sex toys which are alien penises that inject alien eggs into a person. They’re called like Ovipositors, and people get off on being like, quote unquote, impregnated by aliens. That’s a thing. And you can get different sizes of eggs and stuff like that.

Becca:
[19:02] Whoa.

Maggie:
[19:04] And I did not know about this until I watched the episode of that show and I think I was just like, yeah… Taylor’s looking at me with her eyes wide open now.

Jewels:
[19:13] Wait, I gotta know more. So what happens after the egg is injected?

Taylor:
[19:16] My mind is blown. I had no idea this was a thing.

Jewels:
[19:13] Is it like the kid toys like the expanding sponge and you actually birth the baby alien?

Maggie:
[19:17] No.

Taylor:
[19:22] Yeah. How is that? But what?

Maggie:
[19:23] So I believe that the eggs are made out of like a hard gelatin so over time they just melt.

Taylor:
[19:30] So you don’t have to get them out, you just leave them in there and you feel like you have an egg in you.

Maggie:
[19:23] They will over time melt and dissolve.

Becca:
[19:30] Whoa. That is wild.

Jewels:
[19:35] Learn new things every day

Taylor:
[19:39] We do. That is… my mind is like blowing up right now.

Maggie:
[19:41] I kind of want to sue search an image to show you but I’m afraid of what I’ll see, but I’ll do it anyway.

Becca:
[19:47] I think you know what you’ll see.

Taylor:
[19:49] Oh my God. But now that you say that, I totally believe that that is a thing that 100% makes sense because you like, it’s like the idea of you know, like danger and excitement and something unknown.

Becca:
[19:54] Yeah.

Taylor:
[20:03] I get it. I mean, I know…

Becca:
[20:03] It’s shit like that makes you feel real vanilla.

Taylor:
[20:09] Holy shit.

Maggie:
[20:11] Yeah.

Taylor:
[20:16] Oh my God.

Becca:
[20:16] What did you google?

Maggie:
[20:18] Ovipositor sex toy.

Taylor:
[20:21] Holy fuck.

Maggie:
[20:25] I’m glad I could bring this to the conversation. You’re welcome guys.

Taylor:
[20:27] They have Porn Hub videos. Well, I know what I’m watching later.

Becca:
[20:35] Whoa… these are one time use eggies?

Maggie:
[20:38] Right.

Taylor:
[20:39] Do you buy more eggs?

Maggie:
[20:38] The dildo I assume is what you would call it can be used multiple times. But the eggs you have to keep buying I guess.

Jewels:
[20:45] Consumable sex products.

Maggie:
[20:48] Yeah. I mean, fucking sell a membership, make some money on that.

Taylor:
[20:53] How do you decide..? How do you know when the egg comes out? Like, how do you make that work?

Maggie:
[20:59] I think it’s a partner thing. Like you have someone deploy it. I assume. I don’t know. I’ve never done it. But I assume that you can also like feel it.

Jewels:
[21:09] It’s a catch and release situation.

Taylor:
[21:13] I can’t believe I’ve never Googled alien porn before, I feel like that is something I probably would have looked up at some point, and now I’m kind of like, I’m ashamed, I’m kind of embarrassed that I haven’t googled this.

Jewels:
[21:18] Yeah. You do have a badass UFO tattoo on your arm.

Taylor:
[21:27] Sooner.

Jewels:
[21:27] Aliens have very interesting penises.

Becca:
[21:29] Yeah, we’re all embarrassed for you.

Maggie:
[21:32] Well, and that’s, I think part of the appeal is that you can self design a dick however you want it to fucking look. It doesn’t have to look like your standard penis.

Taylor:
[21:37] Can look, in fact, you don’t want it to. You want it to look alien?

Maggie:
[21:46] Yeah. Mhm.

Jewels:
[21:46] This reminds me a lot of Sex Ed the show. Have ya’ll watched it?

Taylor:
[21:49] With Gillian Anderson? One of these sexiest people alive. Yeah.

Jewels:
[21:52] Yes, of course. Oh my God. And the teenage girl who draws all the crazy alien porn stuff. Octopus alien porn.

Taylor:
[21:58] Yes, totally. Yeah. That’s amazing.

Maggie:
[22:02] Yes. Yeah.

Jewels:
[22:06] She would have one of these for sure. Glorp.

Taylor:
[22:07] 100%. Yeah.

Maggie:
[22:07] Oh, for sure. Yeah. Yeah.

Becca:
[22:11] Wow.

Taylor:
[22:13] That is insane.

Maggie:
[22:15] No, I’m not judging anyone in our listening group who uses these. But this is an example of one of the things that would frighten me a little bit personally.

Taylor:
[22:22] Right. Right.

Jewels:
[22:20] And that it was not on the radar.

Becca:
[22:21] Yeah, that’s yeah.

Taylor:
[22:22] Right. Right.

Jewels:
[22:29] To be surprised by sex things these days is pretty impressive.

Becca:
[22:30] It is impressive.

Jewels:
[22:33] Keeping that on the lockdown.

Maggie:
[22:34] You’re welcome.

Taylor:
[22:32] For real. Yeah. Yeah, I am thoroughly uh, tickled pink by this knowledge.

Becca:
[22:41] I mean like, I can say that the least attractive thing about it. I don’t think it’s objectively the worst sounding sex toy in the world. I think that the idea of leaving something in my vagina to disintegrate is the horrifying part because I’m so afraid of UTIs and yeast infections.

Maggie:
[23:00] I would imagine that it’s not like a very long experience, but I agree with you, I am also very afraid of that.

Becca:
[23:05] Yeah well even like lubed up condoms, I’m like they used too bright colors on this condom. I don’t trust it. Like I, I only use things that I really don’t think are going to affect my ph balance.

Jewels:
[23:21] Maybe you make homemade lube alien eggs to deploy.

Becca:
[23:25] Ooooh… Gwyneth Paltrow is probably already on it.

Taylor:
[23:30] I’m wondering if you can add cannabis essential oil into the lube? If that would like, do something.

Jewels:
[23:39] You definitely can, I think you’d want to be very careful about your dosage.

Taylor:
[23:43] Right. Put that whole thing in there. No, just thinking, I think you’d be cool to make my own, But then I’d want to add like a little bit of that in there maybe.

Becca:
[23:48] Ooh we can start a lube factory in the kitchen.

Taylor:
[23:57] Yes. I’ve always wanted to. Lube and ice cream. We got to open up a store called Lube & Ice Cream. That’s all we sell.

Becca:
[24:04] Can you imagine how often you would want to go to Lube & Ice Cream, new flavors are in guys!

Taylor:
[24:07] Yeah, that would be amazing. I feel like we have so many good ideas.

Maggie:
[24:13] Wait, can you imagine? Like, our grand opening would just be a giant slip and slide party with ice cream?

Taylor:
[24:19] But it’s like an alien dick that you slip out of and you land in a kiddy pool o giant gelatin eggs.

Maggie:
[24:20] Yeah. With ice cream and, like, just like, we’ll call it the Ovipositor.

Becca:
[24:23] I love it.

Taylor:
[24:32] I would love that.

Becca:
[24:33] I like you leaning into this alien thing.

Maggie:
[24:40] It’s like months later, we’re like, Taylor. Let it go.

Becca:
[24:41] Just buy the toy.

Taylor:
[24:40] I think we need to sell these on our website. Yeah. No, I think that, that would be such a cool store though. If we made like only made homemade lube and ice cream.

Becca:
[24:55] It’s a great idea. Oh my gosh. Where corresponding flavors… incredible.

Taylor:
[25:00] Yeah.

Maggie:
[25:03] Oh my God, what a date night that would be.

Taylor:
[25:07] Right.

Jewels:
[25:07] Ooh yeah, like an ice cream flavor that would pair really well with the lube flavor, it’s not the same flavor, but a pairing…

Becca:
[25:10] What if it’s like chocolate ice cream and merlot lube or something like that?

Taylor:
[25:20] Oh my God, y’all don’t, I almost don’t want to put this on the podcast because I feel like someone’s going to steal the idea.

Becca:
[25:10] It’s a great idea.

Taylor:
[25:20] Trademark! If you say it out loud in Texas, that is legally binding.

Maggie:
[25:44] All right, So what were some of the other topics?

Becca:
[25:50] Well we covered lube.

Taylor:
[25:51] Extensively.

Jewels:
[25:50] Favorite sex toys?

Taylor:
[25:51] Oh yeah. This is the episode we reveal, we’ve been… we’ve been teasing it since the beginning. Yeah.

Becca:
[25:53] We’ve told it so many times.

Jewels:
[26:00] Have we not have we not actually talked about it?

Taylor:
[26:07] We have hinted but not confirmed an endorsement.

Becca:
[26:10] We should have a category for favorite sex toys when it’s solo play. Favorite sex toys, partnered. Ja? They can be the same.

Jewels:
[26:21] Start us off Becca.

Taylor:
[26:21] Ja!

Becca:
[26:26] Yeah. Well, they might be the same for me.

Jewels:
[26:26] You know, I was like, that’s the same for me, too.

Becca:
[26:32] Well, okay, so, my favorite solo play and we’ve probably heard this before uh is the, I don’t actually know the brand. I think mine is plus or Pulse Air or Plus Air? And it’s an Air-Pulse, which is a like clitoral stimulator that rather than… it’s meant to mimic oral sex. So, like, kind of air puffing.

Jewels:
[26:59] Instead of vibrating, it shoots pulses of air at the clitoris. It’s a lot more like a flicking tongue or something like that.

Becca:
[27:00] Yeah.

Taylor:
[27:06] It does still vibrate right?

Becca:
[27:07] I mean, there’s definitely vibration. Yes. Yeah.

Jewels:
[27:09] So it does have like a little O shape that sort of fits around and that’s in contact with you. So while it’s pulsing the air, you do get some vibration just from the device itself as well.

Becca:
[27:13] A little bit of vibration. Yeah. So, I love that for solo play, but I really also love it for partner play a lot.

Jewels:
[27:26] Mhm.

Becca:
[27:27] Um yeah, I really like it. Like, well, A.) it saves your partner some time. If they wanna if they want an easy out and give you a rockin’ orgasm, it’s a great tool. Exactly. Exactly.

Jewels:
[27:44] Or free up their hands for other things. Rather than like if you’re having penetrative sex and they’re stimulating your clitoris and supporting themselves or whatever.

Becca:
[27:45] Exactly. Exactly.

Jewels:
[27:46] Rather than like, if you’re having penetrative sex and they’re stimulating your clitoris and supporting themselves or whatever.

Becca:
[27:46] Yeah.

Maggie:
[27:50] It’s a lot of things to be doing.

Jewels:
[27:51] It’s a lot of things. And if you want some attention to your nipples or somewhere else on your body, little butt slap, you want those hands free.

Becca:
[27:58] Hands free penetration is what we’re talking about here while getting insane clitoral stimulation.

Jewels:
[28:05] Insane clitoral stimulation.

Becca:
[28:10] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I really like it while being penetrated too, though sometimes I get overstimulated when there’s too much going on. So the partner play toy that I like that I just haven’t found a way to use on my own is my bondage tape or rope. I’m sure there’s great ways to use it.
It’s not, it’s never been something that I found arousing is to be bound and alone.

Jewels:
[28:37] I’m having really interesting pictures now, like one like one ankle is taped off and one arm is taped off so you can still stimulate yourself. But you’re like uh, I can’t escape!

Becca:
[28:49] I mean there’s probably, that doesn’t sound awful.

Taylor:
[28:50] God, I just know I’m gonna come home one day. Becca is going to be like ‘Taylor!’

Becca:
[28:57] I’m bound and alone.

Taylor:
[29:05] ‘Don’t be shocked when you walk into my room’. Little Gerald’s game.

Becca:
[29:14] Yeah, yeah, I saw.

Jewels:
[29:26] I’m dehydrated. Bring me water.

Becca:
[29:32] I also love fuzzy handcuffs. All right, Taylor. What about you?

Jewels:
[29:33] Okay. Wait, before we jump to Taylor. I would love to hear more about the bondage. What, like first interest, your introduction, how you navigate that with a partner.

Becca:
[29:37] Yeah, okay. So I’m like, I mean, I would be definitely considered a novice because I don’t know how to tie anyone, I only know how to be tied and I’m not even sure I’m good at that. But no, I had a partner who was into it and so I was like, okay, I’ll try it out, but I never quite enjoyed it. It always took a long time and I was like, oh my God, I was already on the edge about having sex at all tonight, and now I’m just like committing to this time thing. And so it was like, I realized that I do kind of like it and then he like, got fuzzy handcuffs, which I love, I love handcuffs because that’s like quick and the point, gets you bound. But I even like getting tied up with a T shirt, anything. And then I had another partner who was like very proficient at the rope tying and it blew my mind, I was like holy shit, this is amazing. Now I get it, I get it. So that’s what kind of turned me onto that more properly I guess. But I don’t know, it’s not something I need in a sexual relationship, but I have a lot of rope in my sex drawer just in case.

Jewels:
[30:57] In case you need to escape out the window.

Taylor:
[31:01] It’s, it’s also good in a fire escape. Multiple purposes.

Becca:
[31:05] Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah, or like bind an intruder if I need to. So yeah, I also have bondage tape which is a more accessible version for if you’re like into the idea of bondage without wanting to learn how to tie because you do want to learn how to tie properly to not hurt your partner or just make them itchy. Bondage tape is cool. It looks like a roll of duct tape, but it’s tape that only sticks to itself, so it’s not going to stick to your hair, it’s not going to stick to the bed. So you just kind of wrap it around your wrist or whatever it is you’re going to do and you can rip it with your teeth and then it peels right off. It’s super accessible, safe and a lot of fun and easy.

Taylor:
[31:49] How do you approach conversations with new partners on things that you’re interested in trying?

Becca:
[31:52] Yeah, I mean, for me, I tend to, and I’m not an expert in any of this, but I tend to address it very quickly like maybe even before we have sex, to tell them everything I’m into, like I can think of a conversation I had with the previous partner maybe from a couple of years ago where I like, it was our third date we hadn’t slept together yet, but it was clear we were going to that night and I was like, yeah, so is sex important to you? Is there anything you’re into? Any any kinks that you’d like me to know about? Because I figured like the sooner your partner knows what you’re into, the sooner that they can either like start researching it or be like, holy shit, I’m into that too. Or I’m into this thing that’s kind of like that and then if you’re into something and they think that’s weird, then they’re not going to be a good partner for you either way. So better to find out earlier rather than later. Yeah. I usually like do it in a very administrative kind of cut and dry way pretty early on. All right Tay. Tell us about your toys. What are the tops? Taste top toys.

Taylor:
[32:58] Um I don’t really have many. I’m not as much of a connoisseur of sex toys. I have the pulsator thing, because you told me to buy it. You’re like, I got it from Walmart for $30 and I was like, okay, I’ll get one.

Becca:
[33:11] Have you tried it yet?

Taylor:
[33:19] I have. It’s amazing. Yeah.

Becca:
[33:11] Cool. Okay. Good, good.

Taylor:
[33:19] Yeah. And then I bought Jessica want to for her wedding. I bought her a soft blanket from Sam’s and a vibrator from Walmart.

Becca:
[33:30] It’s perfect.

Taylor:
[33:33] Um, yeah, no, that’s really it. That’s all. I don’t really… I don’t have much to contribute to the conversation.

Jewels:
[33:42] Just tell us about your sex life. So what do you do not with toys?

Becca:
[33:43] Yeah. Yeah. Do that.

Taylor:
[33:44] Great. Not at all. No. Let me just readjust here.

Jewels:
[33:50] I mean our room had a shared wall with your room in the Scottish Highlands. And there was definitely sex going on. So I know there is sex happening.

Becca:
[33:50] Getting that Highland sex.

Taylor:
[34:04] I think it was a ghost actually, there was a ghost in the house.

Jewels:
[34:05] No, I don’t think so.

Taylor:
[34:09] A moaning ghost.

Becca:
[34:10] There could have been a ghost in that house.

Taylor:
[34:16] For sure it was a ghost. I promise. No it’s good. I don’t know.

Becca:
[34:19] So have you ever used like accessories or toys in solo play before? Or is that just never been like a big part of your sex alone or with partners?

Taylor:
[34:21] Yeah, not really. I had I had like one vibrator that I used, it was like the Lelo, the nice ones. I use that. But it’s just so much work to get out and then I have to clean it and I hate the whole process so I almost never use it. I’m not really…

Jewels:
[34:49] Lingerie? Any outfits?

Taylor:
[34:21] No, I don’t really use lingerie and no one’s ever really like asked me though, like I’ve never…

Becca:
[34:58] I ask you all the time to wear lingerie.

Taylor:
[35:01] Well maybe if you bought it for me I would wear it.

Jewels:
[35:03] Uh huh. There’s a package showing up at your house next week.

Taylor:
[35:04] Oh that actually reminds me though ,when we’re in Costa Rica, we were laying in bed one night and we were trying to find something to watch for 30 minutes just before we went to bed. And because we were… we watched almost no TV, this was the only time we watched anything we were there and I was like, we should watch the Rihanna Fenty show. So we did and that was a lot of fun. It was really well produced. I was like, damn!

Jewels:
[35:20] It’s amazing.

Taylor:
[35:32] But he was like, maybe we should buy you some Fenty. And I was like, well yeah, you buy it for me and I’ll wear it.

Becca:
[35:38] Cool!

Taylor:
[35:39] But um yeah, I know, I like that stuff. I just never, I don’t know, I always feel like a bit silly when I dress up, you know, because I feel like it’s… I don’t always feel like sexy. I’ve always kind of like… pretending to be sexy. It doesn’t really make me feel confident all the time. I think if I found the right thing that actually made me feel good, I would, but I don’t know, it’s such a mental thing with me. Like whenever I’m not feeling confident about how I look like nothing is going… dressing it up isn’t going to solve the problem. So I don’t know, sometimes I’ll wear, you know, like a low cut top where I’m like, I feel cute, you know? But one time I wore the shirt that I bought that was something I normally wouldn’t wear. But I haven’t, I’ve worn it a bunch since then, but it’s the shirt, it’s the shirt with like the…

Becca:
[36:33] Oh, I notice every time because of this!

Jewels:
[36:35] The laces?

Taylor:
[36:37] The lacy shirt. I never even, I never, that was never my style. I never thought to wear that stuff and then I wore, I bought it one time because I found the shirt, I thought it was really comfortable and soft. It was American Eagle and I wore it and Joey was like… yeah, like his eyes changed. I don’t know what happened. But yeah and I was like, interesting so I bought like a couple like lace up things since then.

Becca:
[37:02] That dress from New Year’s Eve was super hot.

Taylor:
[37:06] The dress from New Year’s Eve I bought. Yeah, that was also like, I’m going to try lace up and I do actually found that I really like that and I never thought I’d be a lace up person, but I do like that. So I have a couple of things, not like that, but I don’t, I still don’t really have any lingerie, but I would like to buy some, or try that. That’s another thing to where I’m like, so I put it on like I have to take off my outfit to put it on and then it’s only going to be on for like 20 seconds.
So it’s also a thing where I’m like, what’s the point really? I don’t know.

Jewels:
[37:36] You don’t necessarily have to take it off, depending on the lingerie.

Taylor:
[37:41] That’s true. That’s very true.

Becca:
[37:42] Ooh there’s one I want to buy you!

Jewels:
[37:43] Lingerie can have crotch access. Um, sometimes it’s nice like if you get like a demi balconette bra where your nipples could peek out at the top, then it just stays, you know, holds them in place.

Taylor:
[38:02] That’s true, not a bad idea. I do like the idea of keeping my clothes on when I have sex.

Jewels:
[38:05] Sometimes that’s the mood set. You are so right when you said sex is mental and sometimes it’s like, I want something cute to wear that is going to just make me feel more covered up today because I just feel like that some days, sex is so mental.

Taylor:
[38:20] Yeah, exactly, Yeah.

Jewels:
[38:24] So I think, like, and I don’t wear lingerie all the time when I have sex, but sometimes it is really nice to have that as an option.

Becca:
[38:32] I love lingerie, it’s not all the time, but a lot of times I like to wear lingerie and it’s for me, it helps me feel sexier because I, despite… I feel like I’m, my, what am I trying to say? I sound sexier than I am.

Jewels:
[38:46] Your personal brand.

Taylor:
[38:47] Lube and ice cream.

Becca:
[38:49] No, I mean, like, I don’t have, I don’t have, like, the highest ex drive in the world, and like, sometimes I’m just like, why am I not in the mood? And like, I’ll put on lingerie, and it helps me, like, yeah, like, feel sexier and it’s fun to, like, show up at my partner’s apartment and have him take my top off and there’s like, crazy lingerie underneath. Let’s go.

Jewels:
[39:12] Just put it on one day in the afternoon when you have a couple hours of work left just for you. Not even for sex, it’s probably going to end in sex because the whole time you can be like, I’m wearing sexy lingerie.

Maggie:
[39:28] I’d be like, I have a wedgie all day.

Taylor:
[39:31] Yeah. Right. Exactly. I know, it’s funny because sometimes I’m wearing something that literally I’m not even trying to be sexy, and Joey will be like…

Jewels:
[39:38] Damn girl.

Taylor:
[39:31] I’m like, I’m wearing a nightgown, like this is not… It’s got like stars on it, I feel like a 12 year old.

Maggie:
[39:53] Becca, are you making an online purchase right now?

Taylor:
[39:56] What are you doing?

Becca:
[39:57] I’m gonna get us matching lingerie. No, it’s just it’s my favorite lingeries. It’s crotchless. It’s amazing. It’s so comfortable, like you could sleep in it.

Taylor:
[40:04] Mmm, that does sound nice.

Becca:
[40:09] Yeah, and it handles my curves, man. Crazy stretchy. It’s amazing. And it’s like, because it like laces down the abdomen, it feels like you can like walk around with it without everything just totally wiggling out, which I… I like a wiggle out.

Jewels:
[40:28] Sometimes you like feeling secure, too.

Becca:
[40:30] Sometimes you do.

Jewels:
[40:32] Maggie, you up?

Maggie:
[40:34] Sure. Um, so for solo stuff, I think maybe all four of us, I won’t speak for Julie.

Jewels:
[40:35] You can speak for me.

Maggie:
[40:42] Might have similar taste, which is really speaking to that technology I think. Um, but mine has the worst name of all of them. It’s called the Womanizer.

Jewels:
[40:55] Yes it does. I think it is, it is both the worst name and maybe the most expensive version because you were a very early adopter.

Becca:
[41:01] I’ve heard that one’s supposed to be even better than any of them, though, isn’t it supposed to be the best?

Maggie:
[41:05] It’s the only one… I bought that one and I didn’t buy another one afterwards.

Becca:
[41:06] They claim to give you something beyond an orgasm.

Taylor:
[41:14] Something call The Womanizer would claim that.

Maggie:
[41:15] Yeah, it does some impressive things. Um, and yeah, like I said after that when I was like, well, I don’t need to buy a different version of this. This one does the trick. Um, but as for partner stuff, I think that’s a very hard question for me to answer in particular because I’m so responsive to who I’m with and their mood that I might really enjoy something with one person and with a different partner, it doesn’t work, kind of thing. So, I’m down for also changing things, but I was going to say with that sort of non answer that I gave you, I do have something that I’ve never tried that I want to try, which I should probably tell my girlfriend about because I didn’t really think about it until today when I was trying to think of these things to talk about. But you know the vibrators that you can control remotely?

Becca:
[42:10] Yeah!

Jewels:
[42:14] You don’t control it. You give the remote to your partner.

Maggie:
[42:14] Exactly, it’s like an app or a remote that your partner has and from a distance, so like you could be at work and you never know what’s going to happen today or you’re at dinner with your friends and uh. That would be maybe weird. Ya’ll know why.

Taylor:
[42:36] Maggie just goes really quiet.

Jewels:
[42:36] Okay, I like how you think you wouldn’t know what’s going to happen. I don’t think Zach could be trusted with this remote. I would get nothing done the whole day.

Taylor:
[42:37] Constantly.

Maggie:
[42:46] That’s true. I think that would be fun to try though. And I think that could also, you know like you guys were saying like sometimes like man, I’m just not in the mood today, I kind of wish I was. I feel like something like that. If you’re thinking about it all day and you have stuff kind of going on all day by the time you and your partner actually see each other and be like, all right, let’s fucking do it! I think it’d be fun.

Jewels:
[43:13] It would be, if nothing else, it would bring a lot of laughs, I think.

Maggie:
[43:17] Yeah, just figure out how to set not during this particular work meeting.

Becca:
[43:22] Yeah, you have to have a Google calendar.

Maggie:
[43:27] Off limits time zones. I was also going to ask you guys about, do you have you ever watched porn with a partner? Okay. Good, good answers everyone.

Taylor:
[43:42] I think, that’s the thing with porn, is like I think it’s so dumb to deny that you watch it. So to me it’s like silly to to pretend that you don’t, you know what I mean? Like everybody watches porn, who cares, of course you’d like to watch other people have sex, like who doesn’t, you’d be it’d be weird if you didn’t watch porn. But yeah, to me that’s not… yeah, I don’t know. But we were talking about that with our friends when we had that girls weekend, we were talking about watching porn with partners and sometimes one of our friends made a good point though where she was like, I don’t like to do it because I only want to go to certain points of the video and it’s not sexy if you’re trying to skip ahead and stuff, which I was like, that’s a good point.

Jewels:
[44:31] She needs to curate.

Maggie:
[44:32] Yeah, I mean like… there are certain things where you’re just like I don’t want to see that.

Taylor:
[44:32] Right? There’s certain things I will watch alone and I don’t want to watch with a partner, but then certain things like videos, I’m like, this is a watchable video with a partner.

Jewels:
[44:39] So it sounds like porn sites needed to have the ability for us to curate a highlights reel for personal and partner.

Taylor:
[44:48] Totally, like save your favorite clips and then you can, they do like a little compilation. Well, she said apparently there’s a Reddit that’s just like porn GIFs and so they’ll like send porn GIFs to each other, which I thought was really cute. I was like, that’s a good idea to be like, oh, I want to try this or this is hot. You know, it’s like a quick little GIF. I thought that was a neat idea.

Maggie:
[45:14] I think I need to give my girlfriend a warning before I do that.

Taylor:
[45:20] Uh, the other thing I thought would be kind of cool, which another friend had told me about years ago was the tiny necklace that’s a vibrator, that’s just like a…. I thought that was kind of a cool idea.

Maggie:
[45:23] What? So you can like travel with it?

Taylor:
[45:36] Yeah, it looks like a really simple pendant. Like it’s literally just like a gold or a silver, just like pendant.

Maggie:
[45:41] All right.

Taylor:
[45:43] But it, you turn the top and it vibrates so it could be sexy if, you know you’re in the airport bathroom.

Maggie:
[45:45] In an elevator at a hotel.

Jewels:
[45:53] A very long overseas flight.

Taylor:
[45:55] I don’t know about y’all but I have been crazy horny on a plane before where I was like, I could have used one of those.

Becca:
[46:01] I don’t know if I felt that on a plane before.

Jewels:
[46:02] I have, luckily we were in business class with beds that under the blanket you were together.

Becca:
[46:10] Whoa.

Taylor:
[46:11] Nice! Damn! What did you do with the stuff?

Becca:
[46:16] Yeah.

Taylor:
[46:20] What’s the cleanup situation there?

Jewels:
[46:22] Keep it clean, relative. Maggie, you might have been on that flight, I don’t know. You weren’t next to us.

Maggie:
[46:31] I probably wasn’t sitting next to you if I was on that flight.

Jewels:
[46:31] You weren’t.

Becca:
[46:35] I can just picture Maggie on your headphones like just do de de, watching ‘A Bug’s Life’.

Maggie:
[46:40] What? Yeah, like single as fuck.

Jewels:
[46:42] There were no people around us.

Taylor:
[46:42] Nice.

Becca:
[46:48] That’s great. You are in the Mile High Club.

Jewels:
[46:48] Surprisingly enough. Yeah. I didn’t think that would be of appeal but you know, if you have a 40 hour itinerary, you can get pretty horny.

Taylor:
[46:52] Yeah, that’s true. That is true.

Jewels:
[46:59] Your boredom really brings it on.

Becca:
[46:59] Alright Julie, hit us.

Jewels:
[47:04] Well, first before I forget, so porn isn’t a big part of my life these days. But a few years ago did come across a female filmmaker who does like way more inclusive, like size inclusive and female centric porn and I can’t remember… I will look her up and put a link. Because I did watch like some of the intro clips to her stuff and it was great and so different.

Maggie:
[47:30] Was it Crash Pad? Crash Pad’s are pretty queer, inclusive ,different?

Jewels:
[47:31] Mm I have no idea. So, this is like a very like one specific filmmaker who started doing all these and she sold them through herself. So I don’t know if she also distributes elsewhere, but I will find it and share it.

Taylor:
[47:48] I uh, that reminds me our friend, one of our other friends had mentioned, there is a new porn site that launched recently, that’s ethical porn that a woman started. And it’s all ethically sourced porn videos, which I thought was a cool idea. I don’t know how diverse they are, but I assume that, you know, she’s probably trying to get a diverse amount of stuff.

Jewels:
[48:11] Totally, um on the sex toy front. So I’m also in the Air-Pulse clit stimulation crew. I think mine is called the Satisfier-Pro, and I was on their website this week and so they make a travel version.

Taylor:
[48:35] I know. I need one.

Jewels:
[48:35] Yeah. And um, I don’t need to belabor the point on how awesome the style of vibrator is, or sex toy. But the other thing that’s really great about it is if you want to try to climax at the same time as your partner, which is by no means anything that has to be part of sex but it can be really nice. This is the only sex toy that’s super reliable, where you can be like, oh we’re going now, okay bam! And you can, you can time it.

Becca:
[49:08] That’s true.

Taylor:
[49:08] This is the.. you’re talking about the pulsator thing? Yeah, that is true. It’s like immediate.

Jewels:
[49:11] Yeah. Yes, immediate and multiples and orgasm on orgasm. And you don’t…

Taylor:
[49:16] It’s almost like I’m like, not prepared, I’m like… It’s like bam.

Maggie:
[49:20] Like I was ready for a whole night, it’s been like two minutes.

Jewels:
[49:25] But how do you stop? That is the real problem with these things.

Becca:
[49:40] What do you mean?

Jewels:
[49:25] Because it gives you such an intense, great orgasm and potentially a chain of orgasms and at a certain point you’re like, where does one begin and one end and can I have another one?

Becca:
[49:40] It’s just like, it gets scary.

Jewels:
[49:40] Yeah, you’re like, I cannot stop myself. Like, I’m gonna have a hand cramp tomorrow, not be able to type on my computer.

Becca:
[49:49] It’s true.

Taylor:
[49:50] I need a little downtime though, which is like, usually I will fall asleep.

Jewels:
[49:53] Well, you’re a better person.

Taylor:
[49:57] I’m really not. I wish that I could go longer. I feel so lame. I’m just like one and I’m like, I can wait a few minutes or I could go to bed.

Becca:
[50:02] I’m kind of that way too. I’m either like, they’re either coming bam bam bam. I’m not going to generally speaking, have an orgasm and then like want to work up to another one over time. It’s more like, yeah, I don’t know. I don’t know. I guess it totally depends on my mood, but that, that resonates with me.

Jewels:
[50:24] It’s not a problem I’ve had with any other toy. I’m not a super high libido person and that…

Becca:
[50:30] The first time Andy he used it on me, it was like that and he was like, oh my God.

Taylor:
[50:42] I still haven’t used mine with Joey, but I think he might have a similar reaction.

Becca:
[50:45] Well, and like, I mean…

Jewels:
[50:45] This was designed specifically single function.

Becca:
[50:45] That’s what I told him.

Maggie:
[50:52] Yeah, it’s technology designed specifically with this purpose.

Becca:
[50:52] It’s got one job.

Jewels:
[50:55] There’s a big difference between sexual and intimate experience and a climactic orgasm.

Becca:
[50:58] Yeah.

Jewels:
[51:05] Which can be part of, or separate from, but the ability to make sure, especially for a lot of women who maybe have trouble or can get really in their head about orgasming to be able to have something that you can use. So you don’t have to think about that. That’s great.

Becca:
[51:20] You don’t have to think about anything really.

Taylor:
[51:22] You really don’t.

Jewels:
[51:23] You do not, you can, you can enjoy the sexual intimate experience and when you want to orgasm, it’s going to happen.

Becca:
[51:27] Yes.

Taylor:
[51:33] Oh my God. Yeah. Normally when I, if I… in order for me to have an orgasm, I have to like create a story in my head, it’s got to be like a whole thing, right? But with that pulsator, it’s like, I don’t, I literally can’t even think, there’s no thought.

Jewels:
[51:34] No space for thinking. No time for thought.

Maggie:
[51:52] You’re like, all right, ready for the story and we’re done.

Taylor:
[51:53] I mean this was this… exactly, opening credits… nope. End credit. It’s opening credits. End credit. This is what it must be like for a lot of men.

Maggie:
[52:03] Yes, Yeah.

Becca:
[52:08] Yeah. That’s so funny. That’s interesting. I am, I’m the same way. I never wondered if other people were like that where yeah, usually, I mean I can enjoy sex and be very present. But usually for me to orgasm, I have to have a story running.

Taylor:
[52:20] Yeah, same.

Becca:
[52:22] Yeah, interesting, interesting.

Jewels:
[52:25] What kind of story? What does this mean?

Maggie:
[52:28] Aliens.

Taylor:
[52:29] Mostly aliens.

Becca:
[52:28] It usually happens around the implant.

Maggie:
[52:31] 100% aliens.

Becca:
[52:35] Um well, it could be like literally exactly what we’re doing, but like in a slightly different setting, like, which is back in a college lecture room.

Taylor:
[52:41] Yes, totally. It’s got to be like a little bit dangerous.

Becca:
[52:53] One of my… I don’t know, one of mine is in a sorority house, even though I’ve never been in a sorority house and objectively don’t find them sexy and like, yeah, that’s part of it, part of it.

Jewels:
[53:02] That is amazing.

Taylor:
[53:06] Mine’s like, um, sometimes mine will be like, he’s like a college tutor but we’re not, you know, learning math or something.

Jewels:
[53:11] Mm.

Becca:
[53:12] I love it.

Maggie:
[53:20] And I flunked the test.

Taylor:
[53:27] Exactly. He’s like, give me that A.

Becca:
[53:29] So that’s your favorite solo and for partner?

Jewels:
[53:37] Yeah, that’s the top for solo and partner. Obviously it doesn’t have to be used every time, but it’s nice to have it, there when we want it. And we’ve tried a number of different partner toys over time, you mentioned Lelo and I remembered, I think there was a Lelo one that I have, that never gets any use because it is a great idea, but my partner is very well endowed and so this particular toy has both like clitoral stimulation and something that slips inside your vagina and sort of rotates a little. I mean it doesn’t rotate, but it’s sort of, I don’t know, what do you call this? Like it doesn’t physically… it makes a circular motion inside your vagina.

Taylor:
[54:14] Circulates, yeah.

Jewels:
[54:21] But having that in during penetrative sex, is just ooh.

Taylor:
[54:23] It seems like too much.

Becca:
[54:26] It sounds like a lot.

Jewels:
[54:27] And to get it to… like the problem I find with a lot of the toys that are designed for both clitoral and internal stimulation is it’s probably not going to hit your clitoris the way just a clitoris specific toy would also, so that one’s just kind of been shelved. The other partner toy that’s really interesting is my show and tell.

Becca:
[54:46] Oooh uh.

Jewels:
[54:48] So this is by Dame Products, which is a great company.

Becca:
[54:51] We re-post a lot of their stuff on Instagram.

Maggie:
[54:53] Oh yeah, I remember that one, we talked about that before.

Becca:
[54:56] Oh, I love the look of it.

Jewels:
[54:57] It’s so adorable.

Taylor:
[55:01] Oh my god, it looks so cute.

Jewels:
[55:10] Now, because of the Satisfyer, Womanizer Air-Pulse toy this actually doesn’t get used much. But I still think it’s a great toy and really awesome for a lot of people. So it is a very small vibrator that sits on your clitoris. I will post a photo and it has two tiny arms that sort of come out from the top and down the sides and the arms are flexible. So you basically pull the arms in, rest this on your clitoris and release the arms and it sort of hooks into your labia.

Becca:
[55:33] Like your labia majora? Interesting.

Jewels:
[55:33] Mhmm. So it’ll stay in place on your clitoris give or take during penetrative sex.

Taylor:
[55:41] That is really nice.

Becca:
[55:33] That’s fucking cool.

Taylor:
[55:41] What is that called?

Jewels:
[55:43] The Eva by Dame Products.

Taylor:
[55:49] I have been looking for something like that. Well I haven’t really been looking, but I wanted something like that.

Jewels:
[55:51] And so it’s got like three, I think, like three speeds.

Becca:
[55:55] Nice. Is there an indention for your clitoris?

Jewels:
[56:00] So it actually sticks out more right there.

Becca:
[56:00] Oohh that sounds very stimulating.

Jewels:
[56:05] Yeah. So that’s pretty great. It’s also awesome for travel because as I mentioned, maybe like hold the button down for like 10 seconds and it’ll just go into a travel sleep mode and then it will not turn on even if you press the button until it’s been plugged into power again.

Becca:
[56:15] Wow.

Jewels:
[56:23] So it’s not going to accidentally turn on in your carry on in customs.

Taylor:
[56:26] That is really nice.

Jewels:
[56:28] It’s very compact for travel, which is why I got it.

Becca:
[56:30] I love it. That’s amazing. I can’t wait to look more into that. Dame Products has some beautiful looking toys.

Taylor:
[56:32] That is amazing.

Jewels:
[56:35] Yes. And they have one of the Air-Pulse style now too. I don’t remember what it was called though, I was on their website today.

Taylor:
[56:45] I love that like the pictures of it are in a seashell in your bathroom and surrounded by cherries and apples.

Jewels:
[56:59] Also this is totally clean and sanitized in case anyone did want to feel. It’s a very soft matte silicone texture. And the little arms. Like, if you press the little arms and you kind of get a feel for what that’s like.

Becca:
[57:13] Ooh. Yeah. Oh I love it.

Taylor:
[57:17] Yeah. I really like this. Now it’s not super cheap. $135 is…

Jewels:
[57:21] It is not cheap. It’s not cheap.

Becca:
[57:24] Eva is $135 on her own? Isn’t Dame the one that has like little bundles though? Where it’s like clitoris bundle and it hits you with a few. Yeah. I remember looking at those like maybe I need a bundle.

Jewels:
[57:26] I have no idea. I think I did see that on their site today. Yes.

Becca:
[57:24] I remember looking at those like, maybe I need a bundle.

Taylor:
[57:25] Oh really?

Jewels:
[57:40] Um and then, so I think I’ve covered like my favorite, maybe second favorite things that didn’t work for me but might work well for others. And then something I have coming in the mail that has not arrived yet that I’m looking forward to is actually like jewelry that has tiny little lassos that are like non piercing nipple jewelry.

Becca:
[57:49] Oooh.

Jewels:
[58:02] So it’s got like a cool necklace that’s like, you know, like a nice silver chain or something that then dangles down and has these two little lassos that kind of just cinch up.

Becca:
[58:08] Love it.

Taylor:
[58:08] That sounds really cool.

Becca:
[58:08] Send pics.

Taylor:
[58:08] Yeah, please do.

Jewels:
[58:13] Oh boy. Um, and I’m waiting to see if that’s actually gonna work for me because I don’t have like super protruding nipples. Like of course they get hard and they stick out a bit, but they’re not like, apparently some women have some major like, and I don’t have those. So it might like one more than the other, one nipple more than the other. I might be a one nipple jewelry person.

Maggie:
[58:45] Just make your house really cold.

Jewels:
[58:48] I mean, yes, but my house is cold.

Becca:
[58:56] Yeah, do ya’ll ever introduce food or anything into your bedroom?

Taylor:
[59:01] That’s a great question. Yeah, I do like to snack in my bed.

Becca:
[59:02] In a sexual way? Not not in a snacks in bed sort of way.

Taylor:
[59:01] Yeah, I do like to snack in my bed.

Jewels:
[59:02] Hey Zach, meet kiwi.

Maggie:
[59:05] In a very like specific and like certain lines can’t be crossed kind of way because it’s like you don’t want a UTI. So like ice cubes can be fun. But like if we’re doing whipped cream stuff, above the waist or you know what other.. chocolate syrup people do that. Like don’t put that inside me please.

Becca:
[59:34] Oh God. Yeah. That’s not happening.

Taylor:
[59:39] Really good. It’s like a combo. That looks good. 50 bucks on Amazon, might have to do some trial tests over. It might be overkill, but it could be nice. I don’t know.

Becca:
[59:41] Ooooh.

Maggie:
[59:45] That might be overkill at that point honestly.

Taylor:
[59:39] It might be overkill, but it could be nice. I don’t know.

Becca:
[59:46] I feel like for me, I generally… I don’t know. I feel like that would be too on the nose, so to speak. Like when it’s locked in on your clitoris. That’s my concern about Eva too. Is that my… when I’m like using my Air-Pulse, it’s going all over the place. It’s not like hanging out. Yeah. I like there’s um, there’s some different pathways that she goes along. And eventually she…. yeah, she’s got her route and she ends up there. But like, to hold it there I think it would be like very startling for me.

Maggie:
[1:00:23] Too much. Yeah, there’s, there’s a line that’s crossed when you’re in like, a pain zone. It’s like, well, this isn’t gonna result in an orgasm, but it is an intense feeling.

Becca:
[1:00:38] Yeah. Whenever you just start to short circuit and your body is just jolting.

Maggie:
[1:00:40] Um, one thing that Phil and I did for a little while was, we had a like, sex toy subscription box, which was really fun because then it’s kind of like… what Taylor and I were talking about earlier with the meal kits is like, oh, you’ll try something that you wouldn’t have otherwise or something like that.

Becca:
[1:00:56] Yeah.

Maggie:
[1:01:00] But we found that over the course of several months, it was just like a lot of things that were too similar to each other and then it was too expensive. It’s like, we don’t need another one of those, so we stopped doing it, but it was fun for a little while.

Becca:
[1:01:06] So what was something that y’all tried and you were like, oh, I never would have tried that otherwise.

Maggie:
[1:01:14] Um there’s like some nipple… like, warming chapstick basically type stuff.

Becca:
[1:01:24] Cool.

Maggie:
[1:01:32] And yeah, I like, hadn’t really thought of that before. And what else? There was a couple of things in there that um we were like, oh, this is like one of our favorites, one of the things that I, we hadn’t, we probably wouldn’t have bought on our own was one of those candles that melts into like massaging lube basically. It’s like a candle and then becomes massage oil that came in one of them. Yeah. And then like a lot of dildos. So yeah, but it was a fun, little thing. It was like sex toys and health stuff so it also came with like hand soap, and candles, actual candles for your house, like not sex candles.

Becca:
[1:02:11] Cool combo.

Maggie:
[1:02:12] Yeah, like some bath bombs and that was nice because then we would take baths together and be like, oh, like now we have a bath time together and these like sexy new things to try. So it was good. It was like a cool combo of things I enjoyed.

Becca:
[1:02:25] Yeah, I love that.

Taylor:
[1:02:25] I didn’t think about like bath sex stuff. That could be nice.

Maggie:
[1:02:29] Or it’s nice to have a bath before and or after sex in general. I’m personally a germophobe, so having a bath beforehand’s a great way to start things off for me.

Becca:
[1:02:29] Yes.

Taylor:
[1:02:33] Uh huh.

Becca:
[1:02:37] Totally. Yes.

Taylor:
[1:02:37] Sex in the shower is something that I aspire to figure out. It’s not as simple as it seems when one of you is 5,0 one of you is 6,2.

Becca:
[1:02:51] No.

Jewels:
[1:02:54] The height difference is impossible. No, it’s just… yeah, I know.

Becca:
[1:02:54] Yeah, I’m picturing it.

Taylor:
[1:03:01] Everybody picture it.

Becca:
[1:02:54] I like, even without the height difference, it’s not something I’ve ever mastered. I like oral sex in the shower in either direction. Like that a lot because it feels very like, you’re immediately cleaned off.

Jewels:
[1:03:16] Interesting, interesting.

Taylor:
[1:03:16] I did, the yeah, the clean off aspect is really…

Jewels:
[1:03:21] Yeah, like shower bath, hot tub sex… none of it does it for me. I also find that because the water is a lot more…

Taylor:
[1:03:29] It’s like anti-lubricating.

Jewels:
[1:03:38] Yeah, it’s not as slick as like a nice lube or your own lubrication. And then uh the clean notion reminded me, I know not everyone in this room is a fan of it, but I do like having a sex blanket that is like a nice plush soft blanket with a waterproof layer.

Taylor:
[1:03:48] Here she goes.

Jewels:
[1:03:53] I don’t use it all the time but sometimes if I don’t want to have to think about how much lube I’m going to use today or if I have to do laundry tomorrow, throwing that down’s not bad. Long term relationship stuff, just get ready for it ladies.

Taylor:
[1:04:03] I’m just going to start using the Becca, the blanket Becca gave me with her sexy body on it as my sex blanket.

Jewels:
[1:04:08] Oh, okay. You know what? We should make sex blankets so much sexier than they are…

Becca:
[1:04:19] We should because, you know, my beef with sex blankets…

Jewels:
[1:04:23] It’s that they’re not sexy. It’s not something you’re going to pull out with a new relationship and be like, hold on, let me put this blanket down. It’s not sexy.

Becca:
[1:04:29] I like, I like the concept of sex blankets. I think it’s important. Everyone eventually has the… right? You have your sex towel, you know, stuff that you wipe stuff off with. So we all have it. But sex blankets, in my experience when I’ve had them, they’re like a deep red and it’s laid out and you look like you’re about to be sacrificed.

Taylor:
[1:04:48] That could be sexy.

Becca:
[1:04:50] Yeah, Yeah.

Maggie:
[1:04:51] You could do one that’s like, um it has a bunch of different positions on it, so then you can be having sex and be like, I want this one.

Becca:
[1:04:55] Go go. I like that. Like Twister kind of.

Maggie:
[1:05:01] Oh hey yeah.

Becca:
[1:05:04] Just do Twister.

Jewels:
[1:05:06] Yeah. Sex blankets could be way sexier. They are not, they’re not sexy. But if the difference between having sex or not having sex is you don’t want to think about the laundry tomorrow.

Becca:
[1:05:07] 100%.

Taylor:
[1:05:20] How messy is your bedroom getting?

Jewels:
[1:05:22] Not that messy. But do I want to sleep on like a sex spot that night if I’m having sex before I go to bed?

Taylor:
[1:05:28] I do it all the time, it’s not fun.

Jewels:
[1:05:31] Yeah.

Becca:
[1:05:32] Yeah, I don’t like when you’re like, you’re in bed afterwards, you like, there’s come under my shoulder.

Taylor:
[1:05:36] And just like stickiness.

Jewels:
[1:05:36] Yeah. Yeah, that was my piece. Okay. I’ve said it.

Becca:
[1:05:38] It’s a good, you gotta plug it because there’s, we got to find a better way. We’ve got to find a better sex towel.

Jewels:
[1:05:52] Well, it’s like being able to say, hey, I want to use lube because when you’re younger, a lot of times you don’t know, you’re allowed to say that, it never occurs to you. And I think the sex blankets the same way.

Becca:
[1:06:00] Well, I literally dated someone who thought that using lube meant that y’all both weren’t sexy. Like I wasn’t lubricating enough, which means he wasn’t sexy, you know? Like it’s insane.

Jewels:
[1:06:19] That’s ridiculous. That is not how human physiology works.

Becca:
[1:06:00] It’s cause in porn no one uses lube.

Jewels:
[1:06:19] That’s a lie actually. They just don’t show… just cause you don’t see them using lube.

Becca:
[1:06:21] Well, yeah, that’s what I mean though. Like obviously they have to use lube or they’d all be in very unfortunate situations, but like, that’s it.

Jewels:
[1:06:27] No one wants some vagina chafe.

Becca:
[1:06:30] Like, no, god, I just feel like a lot of people get their heads all fucked up because they don’t see it happening in porn so they don’t think it happens in real life.

Jewels:
[1:06:39] Yeah, that’s not a good way to judge things. The alcohol is really working for me. This is the most open I’ve been about sex ever. Yeah, Maggie you’re special.

Maggie:
[1:06:39] I’ve never been shy.

Jewels:
[1:06:39] Yeah, Maggie you’re special.

Taylor:
[1:06:59] Oh, speaking… Okay, so, sorry, this is the little hetero centric Maggie, but um have ya’ll ever used like male sex toys? That’s something that I’ve never really…

Becca:
[1:06:59] Like, cock rings?

Taylor:
[1:06:59] Yeah, like anything that would be used on a guy. I’ve never really like ventured into that area before, so I don’t know, guys are so much more standoffish about that stuff I think, um from my experience, I don’t know, or like not as interested.

Jewels:
[1:07:25] Zach’s not standoffish at all about anything sex related, but also we don’t use a bunch of male sex toys.

Taylor:
[1:07:28] I know.

Jewels:
[1:07:36] I do have like a distant memory of maybe a cock ring a long time ago. I just don’t think he dug it or a lot of the cock rings are made so they have like a little vibrator that’s supposed to hit your clitoris and stimulate you and I just don’t think it works nearly as well as you controlling something aim wise.

Taylor:
[1:07:36] Right.

Jewels:
[1:07:58] Um, yeah, that’s a good question.

Becca:
[1:08:00] I can’t think of any experience I have. Right. I mean, a little bit of little bit of butt plug action. Yeah, butt plugs are, you know, they see they see no gender. That’s what I love about them.

Taylor:
[1:08:14] They’re genderless.

Becca:
[1:08:17] Yeah. But other than that, I can’t.. I’m trying to think of a dick specific and I’ve never used a cock ring I don’t think. Well, okay, no, I have used a cock ring. I’ve never enjoyed a cock ring.

Taylor:
[1:08:20] Yeah. I’ve never really looked into it. But I know, like again one of our friends had said she was researching male sex toys and there’s a lot more out there than you would think, like there’s like new options coming out and stuff.

Jewels:
[1:08:47] It’s definitely a growing market. I did notice when I was looking up the Satisfyer Air-Pulse stimulator that I have, um, they have a new, sex toy that’s for men, sort of like a modern rendition of the fleshlight, but literally has, I think like warming action in it and it like narrows at the front so it gives a lot of stimulation to the frenulum.

Becca:
[1:09:15] Mhm.

Jewels:
[1:09:16] Um, so I think, I think male sex toys are definitely coming along the way on the technological front.

Becca:
[1:09:22] I was just, I have a book that I love, it’s called Oh! Joy Sex Toy, and it’s like a comic strip, I should have brought it, it’s so cool. And they basically do a review of sex toys, it’s a couple. But they do this kind of visual review with comic book characters and it is really, really great. It’s very educational, very helpful and makes you feel…

Taylor:
[1:09:42] And they’ve been doing it for like a decade, at least, right? Because I remember seeing it in high school.

Becca:
[1:09:47] Yeah, they’ve had a blog for a long time and they’ve turned it into a book.

Taylor:
[1:09:50] That’s awesome.

Becca:
[1:09:51] Um Bbt yeah, I was reading one about a fleshlight equivalent. It’s not fleshlight, but the same basic thing, and I was actually talking my partner about it and I was like, is this like, I guess I’ve never heard of someone having this, and he’s like, yeah, I feel like, the idea is like if men have a masturbation sex toy, then you’re a pervert, which doesn’t make any sense because men masturbate all the time, and women don’t…

Taylor:
[1:10:09] Men are already perverts.

Jewels:
[1:10:13] Perverts on’t need toys to be a pervert.

Taylor:
[1:10:14] Men are perverts either way.

Becca:
[1:10:14] Well yeah, and like women, we all have toys, well we don’t. Many women have toys to masturbate and it’s accepted that women have toys to masturbate. But like why can’t men have toys to masturbate?

Taylor:
[1:10:21] Yeah, because I think there’s this mentality that women are like, uh our equipment is like flawed somehow, or we like need help. And men, it’s like that mentality like, oh if your if your dick isn’t working 100% of the time, you can’t just it get up and go, then there’s something wrong with you.

Becca:
[1:10:21] Totally.

Jewels:
[1:10:43] I think men rationalize it as like, oh women need training wheels for sex and that’s what sex toys are.

Taylor:
[1:10:47] Yeah. Yeah. And I’m just like, I exude sex, like it’s just this bullshit like macho mentality. Yeah. It’s dumb. I feel like, yeah, it’s interesting as much as we get in our heads about it, I feel like men get in their heads about it in different ways, but it’s still just as damaging. How’s the lesbian sex world?

Maggie:
[1:11:14] Can’t complain. Um no, I mean, I think it’s like with any… with anybody it can be awkward. Some people do things differently and you’d be like, oh it’s not, that’s not gonna work for me. Some people like different stuff. I was going to say earlier that um, I probably get to play more with gender roles than your average straight couple which can be really fun.

Jewels:
[1:11:42] We talking strap ons?

Taylor:
[1:11:42] I would love to wear a strap-on.

Maggie:
[1:11:47] Yeah. Or like, yeah, strap ons. But I mean, I guess it’s… straight couples can have like dominant moments versus non dominant moments and that kind of thing too. But yeah, it’s just like, I don’t know, I’m a switch personally so like I can be very dominant and I can be very submissive. Like I said, I’m always kind of like reactive to how my partner is so I feel like, in addition to that the queer community also opens a lot of doors. So I feel like there’s just like a whole, just so many options of what to do. Sometimes it’s hard. It’s like, I just want to have boring sex today.

Taylor:
[1:12:21] Right, yeah, I don’t want to be interesting.

Jewels:
[1:12:25] I was thinking about that today in preparation for this, was like, you know, there’s a lot of interesting, intimate ways you could have intimacy and sex, but, I have so much going on in my life that just having sex in my relationship in a tried and true fashion is great, and if I have, like a Sunday afternoon, that’s totally open do I want to spend it trying something new that might not pan out and be something either of us loves? Or do I want to spend that long afternoon hitting all the right spots the way I know is going to be an awesome afternoon, and that’s like such a hard thing and it feels like we’re so boring, I’m so boring. Um but yeah, I don’t know, it’s sort of a tough balance.

Maggie:
[1:13:14] Yeah, I agree. Because I definitely am like sometimes if you know it works, just do that, let’s just do that and it’s like well, at what point is that quote unquote boring but like who fucking cares?

Jewels:
[1:13:14] Is it working?

Maggie:
[1:13:14] Like yeah who fucking cares? Like, just have a good time.

Taylor:
[1:13:36] I said I’ve never had sex with a woman in real life, but I’ve had many sex dreams with women, and I’m always the dominant one, which I don’t know what that says about me… anyway.

Maggie:
[1:13:46] Well um, I highly recommend trying it.

Taylor:
[1:13:48] Oh, that reminded me. I’m so drunk. Can we just end the podcast there?

Jewels:
[1:13:53] I’m so drunk.

Maggie:
[1:13:56] You better keep that in the fucking… that’s got to be the end, that’s gotta be the end credits.

Taylor:
[1:14:02] Yeah, that’s got to be the very last thing.